ho-hum

Remember me? It's been awhile. I just haven't had much energy to post. Lost in the hub-bub of life. More my self pity..I've been super depressed. typical when the weather changes to shit. I have to keep myself together for my family. They need me, but all I want to do is sleep. I have no motivation.

I started a 90 day biggest Loser program and it's kicking my butt. I haven't been as diligent as I should For the money I paid and the results that I have been getting in such a short time, I should rock it. I just...ugh

I need to quit smoking. I have been an off and on again smoker since I was 20. This last time I hit them hard. Leaning on them for everything my mind doesn't want to face. And the thing is, my life isn't bad. Not bad at all. Self Loathing for nothing.

Hannah was so sick for so long from Sept to just a week ago she had tubes put in her ears. 7 wks of getting up 6x a night (thankfully hubby split time, but it adds up). She is a whole different child now that she is feeling better, but in that time I kept falling deeper in an exhaustion filled ditch.

Her first birthday is coming up and I feel guilty that I dont have the energy or money to make it a big bash. AJ had so many balloons he was lost in them. So far I have only ordered her cake and set a date. I need to get invites out to the elder generations, cause that is all we are inviting.

She is allergic to milk and that has come to be more difficult to get around. Everything has milk in it.

I'm cranky and tired and taking it out on AJ whom I can't stand his whining. I'm raising my voice more and more and I hate it. His selective hearing is driving me nuts.


hugs to all.

I've been trying to keep up and am happy for those mommy's to be. Seems like everyone I know is pregnant on line and in "real" life.

new tricks: in no particular order

holds her own bottle
swings
stands
crawls
sits up
first day of daycare and 1st grade (previous pic she dove out of chair, Bug was seriously not letting it happen again!)

Hats off

quick note before heading to Bug's first soccer game of the fall season.

Hannah is all through with her helmet. Done. Done and Done....it is now sitting on a pile of clothes in her room to be put away later.

Pictures to come.

schools in session

survived my first week. only three days but hello, that was enough.
love my new position at the middle school working with my old elementary
family and kiddos. I feel bad for all those dont have AC. I'm in one of the two buildings in the districts that have AC. Ifind that a fabulous perk of the middle school. I'm still learning the building, so huge compared to the small country elementary school. I only get lost half a dozen times a day.

AJ is loving first grade. He is doing well and says his new teacher is
very nice. He has homework and is excited about it...boy will that
ever change in the future. Soccer has started and he is one of the
more skilled kiddos on his team, which is great for his little ego.

Hannah is adapting well to her new daycare. K is awesome and finds
Hannah to be a very easy and happy baby. Hannah has an appt. next
Wednesday for her helmet and I am 99.9% sure he will say she is all
done. I can't wait to have a "hats off party" for her (stealing your idea Stacie). Her head is beautiful and with no longer having the helmet all her special needs
services will be done with as PT ended two weeks before school
started. She is at the cusp of crawling and we are baby proofing as we
go. We are digging out the gates, we got at her baby shower, this
weekend. She can roll like crazy when not being helped around by AJ.

Enjoy your holiday weekend. We will try not to melt as this past week is meeting and passing Maine's record highs for this time of year. Not cool. (literally) Earl is heading this way, but hopefully wont hit us too hard as it's going to be just off the coast. But I do foresee losing power at some point due to high winds and rain.

AJ's play date is just about over, we are heading over to FIL for sandwiches as he has AC. Hope all are doing well.

LONG TIME NO SEE

hey all. I am so sorry it's taken so long to post...Having two kids sure is different then one.

We are doing well. Summer has been ok. I fell in a funk that was hard to get out of. Unsure about being recalled for school, but I was so that is good. This past week has been productive. More so then the whole summer combined. Dont think I juggled the age difference well with activities for Bug.

Hannah is near crawling and only has a few more weeks in her helmet. PT is over and she is doing great. She has two teeth on the bottom with two more coming through up top.

Bug is excited for first grade but is having nightmares (like at least four different days in this past week) not sure if this is related cause when he is conscious he is excited. He was sick the other day with a temp of 103.1 which made me nervous, he was talking gibberish. But it's passed with just a sore throat to show for it.

I'll be working Middle school this year with a little girl dx with Downs. I know her from when I worked in elementary three years ago and then via case management. She is a sweetheart but a handful.

H wants my keyboard...will try to be better w/ posting...

if you want to follow via FB then email me...I'm addicted

molding

Hannah had her molding the day after she turned five months. I have never heard her cry so hard. It was almost comical. Every time the dr. moved away from her to get something off the bar she would stop crying, then when he came back she would start crying again, before he even did anything. He was great with her.

Two more weeks and my dear sweet baby girl will have her helmet. I will update later with pictures, cause yeah I took pics the whole time. (I even had Mike and the Dr. taking pictures too). I just dont have the energy to do that right this second. Bug has t-ball in a half hour...then I am taking a nap. I'm exhausted.

4 + 2 = SIX MONTHS!!!!...UPDATE

UPDATE

So, I talked to the Ortho place today. I was told that there is a branch in my backyard instead of the one we were referred to. (this is amazing since it's the only place in the state that our ins. covers. Next closest place in the next state over)

SO, I was like awesome and by the way I want a sooner appt. I got one. For next Wednesday, for eval and scan. I am told this should take 90 min. two weeks from then is the fitting.

She said that these dates were tentative because she needs to wait on approval from ins. I said, NO. these dates are set. If ins. doesn't cover it we will pay out of pocket. Her response. Do you realize how expensive this will be. My immediate reply. You do realize this is my daughter we are talking about. I dont care how expensive it will be. surprising she didn't have a response...

So we wait. BUT only for a week.
________________________________________________________________________________________

Hannah is doing so well that we are reducing her PT session from 2x a week to 1x a week.

I got a call today (message on voicemail) and Hannah's scan for her helmet appt. is June 8th. WTF. JUNE. she will be six months. She was dx at four months. It shouldn't be taking this long. I dont have access to a phone during the day while at work, so I am having hubby call tomorrow to request an earlier date. There better be a time this month.

Right now I am in the line of fire between Bug and his grandfather, Poppy, wrestling session.

better go before I get nailed...

will continue to update soon.