Thursday, August 20, 2009

MIL hell

So it's probably been since I found out I was pregnant. But got worse especially when we found out we were having a girl.

she is so dramatic. squeals and gasps and constant talking like an overly excited cheerleader minus the valley girl part.

She is sensitive and has low self-esteem that makes everyone of our exchanges lately make me feel like a bad guy cause she cringes away or acts like a mouse.
for example last night I was getting a drink of water out of the fridge. It was almost eleven at night, most lights were off. I went to close the fridge and there she was...BAM in my face. I jumped and said "Geez you scared the hell out of me." A normal response for getting scared to death. She was all apologetic and acted like I yelled at her. where as other people would have laughed and said gotchya. She acted like she did something wrong. which she didnt. I dont know how to explain it. It's just so annoying.

She lives with us and at times the lines of who is Bug's parent seems thin. She is constantly disciplining him and even over riding what we have told him. Or if we are talking to him she will cut in. Or if we ask him a question, she will answer. I highly believe in teaching moments and will ask Bug a question about something that might have happened or just happened or what if this happens type scenarios. She will answer or give him hints. UGH. The other day we all went out to eat, Bug, hubby, me and MIL. Bug forgot to thank the waitress for something and instead of a verbal cue, which at this point he is getting too old for, I was giving him a non-verbal cue so he would come up with the words himself...MIL jumps in and gives the verbal cue. It just bugs me. When hubbby and I are there, she should back down. We keep reminding her, and she is like, I know I know, but still does it. DRIVES ME CRAZY.

The latest piss me off straw was last night. We went to a ball game. the four of us. The crowd was crazy. As we were leaving. I was telling Bug to wait up, dont get too far ahead we didnt want him to get lost. He was great. Guess who goes ahead and gets lost in the crowd.....MIL!!! I even hollered over the crowd to her when I saw she was about disappear under the stadium where the food and exits are. Where are you going...wait up. She looked up and kept going. She didnt say anything to us, where to meet her. what she was doing. Hubby had to use the bathroom so we made a meet spot. We found each other quickly. MIL was still MIA. Hubby went back inside looking for her,he came back saying he didnt see her. I went into the ladies room looking for her...we couldnt find her.

We decide to walk the long distance to the car to see if she just simply left without us...Bug is near tears begging us not to leave without Grana. We try to reassure him that we wont. I am seething. about to blow a gasket. I didnt realize when I was pre-teaching Bug about getting lost in crowds that I should have been teaching MIL instead. Sure enough she is leaning on the hood of the car. She walked the back streets of &^$$&()**** all by herself. Smart woman. She left us worried and searching for her. What the hell. I was so mad. Hubby warned me to stay calm.

I had a million and one things I want to say to her. Instead I calmly say, maybe do you think next time you could stick with us even if we have to walk slower (that was her excuse, she didnt want to hold us up...) I'd rather do that then be worried about where she was. I said. (Besides I am five months pregnant. How fast does she think we were going to be walking and in a speed controlled crowd...arg.)

I am so annoyed with her. It just keeps getting worse. what am I to do?


  1. oh man. i wouldn't be able to do it. at all. just the stepping in as far as parenting things would be enough for me to throw up my hands. Hopefully things will get better when Hannah arrives and she can help out? ((HUGS))

  2. ((Super Hugs))
    That sounds like HELL on WHEELS.
    I would not be able to take the stepping in on parenting part. I would have blown up on her. God bless you for having more patiants than me. LOL I hope it gets better soon.

  3. yeah I am not dealing with it well. I've cried all day. I was going to go to my dad's this weekned. Get away. but he is busy. Doesn't seem like I will be able to get up there at all this summer. That sucks.

    I just need to get away from here---HER. I miss having my own place. I dont think I will be able to take her squeeling and just plan giddiness all the time when the baby gets here. She better not pick her up all the time. Oh I dont know what I am going to do.

    I miss MY Mom. I miss her so much.

  4. This sounds so very frustrating! I have no ideas on good ways to deal with this - it sounds like you are a lot better at keeping your temper than I am! I am thinking of you though and hoping this gets better somehow.

  5. What a pain in the ass. I have a MIL post brewing too after this past week!