Saturday, April 11, 2009


I was browsing a friends blog when I came across SITM. I immediately emailed Kym who created SITM. IFers had already been paired, but there was one blogger, Stacie who she had failed to match with someone. Thank God I came along.

My excitement to have squeezed in under the line was through the roof.

I visited Stacie's blog and was really excited that she has children. Two adorable twin boys. They have the same name as my two older brothers, Ja.son and Sha.wn. how weird is that. The reason I was excited about this is because I have Bug. He is five. I talk a lot about him. how can I not. he is my world. But it sometimes makes me feel guilty for my dear IF friends that have yet to experience the joys of parenthood. I feel selfish for wanting another. So for Stacie to have children, the guilt wasnt there and it was yet another way we have something in common.

Stacie is a teacher. I worked in a classroom at our local elementary with children in an autism program, then as a preschool teacher and back to special ed. where (before being laid off) worked with children in an Alternative school for kids with major behavioral issues that removed them from regular ed. classrooms. So we both have worked in the school system. I knew I should have listened to my dad and gotten my teaching degree, instead of majoring in behavioral science and human services. the jobs I have loved-- work with schools and in the classroom. So to hear Stacie gripe about school at times, cracks me up, because I have been there.

Ja.son and Sha.wn's room is giraffe themed. Bug's was safari. More to the point. Elephant and giraffes. Stacie's reasoning was heart touching. When the boys were in the NICU the walls were covered in giraffe's. Giraffes became a symbol for her. A source of comfort (I loved the pink giraffe print stockings that I found for her). elephants became a source of comfort for me too and with elephants came giraffes.

I'm one of five children. I'm a twin myself. Stacie, did you know that? I have a twin brother. Marc. Each one of us had something special with my Mom. (who passed away a month before Bug turned 2). When I was a child our safe word for strangers was purple elephant with pink polka dots. that way if someone other then mom said they were going to pick us up, they had to have this code. Later mom and I had a our own special something, something that my siblings didn't have, Elephants full. You think of all the elephants in the world and they are full of love, now that is a lot of love. Elephants full turned into EFuls. It's our way of saying, I love you. It's the way I ended her eulogy at her funeral. Efuls Mom.

So, in these few examples, I have shown how fate has put stacie and I together and with the little things that we have in common we have created a friendship based on our IF dreams. I am and will continue to enjoy getting to know her as we travel this road of IF together.

Thanks Stacie for being there. For your raw honesty and continuing ability to make me laugh out loud when at times all I feel like doing is crying.


  1. Whoa. I didn't know you were a twin! Plus, my mom collects elephants. It is a huge deal in our family to find elephants any time we go somewhere new! And the teaching thing is just...scary! :-) The similarities just keep adding up -- it was meant to be that we'd meet!

    Thank you for your kind words. I look forward to traveling this road with you, too. Hugs!

  2. I'm sitting here like a blubbering fool knowing that such a pairing of coincidences happened through SITM! This is what it's all about! :) You both are amazing!